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Building Change

I'm wondering how you feel about change because change scares me.

I attended the same school for eleven years (from prekindergarten through eighth grade) and I then attended a public high school in my hometown because the school to where my dad sent me only serves students through eighth grade. Some of my fondest memories are of that school. It wasn't until the night before school started in ninth grade that it really settled in: I was growing up.

Finding Comfort

Last week, Sarah asked me about my coping skills.  She was looking into The Vagina Monologues and was talking about coping skills that survivors use.

I’m not at all familiar with the work, but apparently, it talks about battered women or something of the like.  She said that it doesn’t go into much detail about what people did to survive.  She asked what kind of coping skills I used to use and what I use now.

Feeling Lonely

Friday should have been Friday the 13th. I had a rough day.

I woke up with a bite on my nose and was having flu-like symptoms. It happened a few weeks ago and I thought that it was an allergic reaction to an insect sting, but this time I wanted to get another opinion and to get some medicine for the future.

My family practice doctor was already closed for the day (he closes early on Fridays), so I went to a local clinic. I was there for three and a half hours for the doctor to tell me that I had an infection and that my symptoms weren't that of an allergic reaction.

Riding Along Resilience

I’ve been pushing myself along lately. I have had a hard time with my mom lately and I’ve had a hard time coping with my depression.

Keeping It Together

The last time I spoke with my counselor, she said that I seem to have it together.  The first thing that went through my mind was, “I do?”.

The reason I say this is because I don’t at all feel like I have it together.  For one, I never have time to do the housework (I go to school full time and work part time), except for taking care of my pets.

Coming The Way

It was last 19 November that I posted my first blog on this site. I read through my blogs and I see the way I've come. So far, I think that I'm heading in the right direction. I love writing here because I just get to write what I'm feeling, I get to ramble and I love hearing from you. I've seen how much I've grown and learned in the past eleven months. All I can say is "Wow...".

Passing Along the Comfort

This time of the year is significant for me. When I first told my mom about the nightmares that I was having, she told me not to tell anyone. It was four years later when I finally broke down and told someone what was bothering me. That's why this time is so special for me. I think of it every year.

Things Could Be Better

I'm sorry I've been away for so long (well, long for me because I used to post on here all of the time, even though I constantly check the site for new blogs and comments). I haven't been doing that well lately.

Stubbornly Moving...

Since I've made the decision to heal, the hardest part is actually moving along the journey. I knew that it wouldn't be quick or easy, but I'm slacking. I'm a terrible procrastinator, so slacking is nothing new for me.

Beginning A New Chapter

Within an hour of posting my last blog, I found out that a childhood friend of mine passed away. This was hard to take. Although he and I were never particularly close, I still have memories of him and it's still hard for me to believe that I'll never see him again. Unfortunately, I was unable to make it to the memorial services in my hometown; however, he was kind enough to visit me in my dream Monday morning. Even though we really didn't get to talking, his smile was enough to let me know that he was there.


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About Stacey Lannert

Stacey is free. In January 2009, Missouri Governor Matt Blunt commuted her sentence of life without parole. She is currently speaking out about sexual abuse and sharing her message of love, healing and forgiveness.

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