Ladies.  God and I and you are going to heal you.  In your time.  #1 on your to do list:  1.).  Go to some video store somewhere and rent Home for the Holidays with Robert Downey jr. and Holly Hunter.  Trust me just do it.  You're going to have to learn to trust again.  I am safe.  Take it home and watch it.  Laugh your donkey off.    2.).  Take whatever it is that you need in order to heal  practice Self Care.  If you feel like crying, cry.  Then when you're done get up and go about your business.  If you need to vomit, open the barf bag you carry in your purse (If you followed my first lesson)., open the bag, vomit in it, close the bag, and toss it.  And go about your business.  If you need to curl up in a ball for two weeksin the dark, turn off all electronics, lock the door, turn off the lights, curl up in a ball upside down on the couch in my case for two weeks.  When you're done get up, go about your business.If you need to sit on the grass in the sun awhile, do it.  You get the idea.  I don't sit in grass because I was raped in the grass at age 4.  whatever works for you.  I go to the Holden Pier and listen to the ocean and seagulls..  And keep doing for yourself whatever you need for self care solace and healing.  RX:  PTSD, complex, Acute, with symptoms such as nightmares, insomnia, flashbacks, somatic memories, intrusive memory flooding.  Get grounded.  Pull youself.  Place things in your life to pull you back, like a Learning to Let Go book by mellody Beattie.  Dissociation pulls you out and away.  I recommend highly:  What worked for me:  Play hard for at least 1 hour per day.  No exceptions.  If you can do it Play as much as You Can Until you get better.  Play with children.  children are God.  Cheers!  You Healing sisters Angel, Carrie  Oh, and 3.).  Be safe.  If you are driving and you start balling, you are unsafe, pull over.  If the state trooper comes knocking on your window, tell him you're busy balling.  to wait until you're finished.  When you are ready to talk to taht person, if you need it, ask them to lead you back to your home or place of safety.  they will trust me.  they did it for me.They waited.  til I was ready to drive.  they said, "Take your time Mam." 

then they led me home.  And he commented on ce we got there, "And by the way you're license plates are expired."  I said, "Oh, thank you."    Many years of dissociating can be quite detrimental.  get as far away from your perpetrators as possible.  their presence around you may cause you to dissociate and be unable to take care of business well.  cheers!  Your Healing sisters Angel.  Carrie