1.)  Walk into it.  You had/have dreams.  Things you always wanted to do experience, have, enjoy.  When those situations are in front of you, walk intohem.. Walk into the light.  That is your healing.  Situations will present themselves to you.  Your jaw will be on the ground.  You'll be thinking/asking, Me ?  This is for me?  Huh?  This life occurs, unfolds in divine order.  Please walk into your healing.  You deserve it.  Your dreams are going to come true, but you have to do your part and let them envelop you.  Enjoy.  2.)  Affirmations.  Use them.  They will help you walk into it.  For example.  You have to esteem yourself.  I am not concerned with how anyone ever did or did not treat you or if you mattered to them.  As of today, I invite you to esteem youself.  This must happen in order for you to heal.  Some I use are:  "I am good enough."  "I am enough."  Then love yourself and treat yourself like the princess you are.  The past is in the past.  "Spirit is in me."  Breathe in and out deeply 3 times. With your feet on the ground sitting.  hands open and facing up.  Say "Spirit is in me."  This next one is working for me.  I am a work in progress.  I cannot fathom even fathoming forgiving my perpetrators.  My body is permanently altered as a result of their actions.  The path of my life and the physical pain I experience everyday is a result of their actions.  What I am able to do/accomplish in this life is limited due to their actions.  I have permanent physical limitations and incomprehensible physical pain at times.  As a result of beatings as a little 4,5 year old girl with separation anxiety simply being sad because her mommy disappeared, so her daddy beat her in the neck with books till she fell asleep with her face splat in a plat eof food.  she could not eat she was too sad.  and the beatings lasted so long she fell asleep during them, waking up with face ina plate of food.  nice, huh?  All I needed was for someone to build a fort with me on the patio.  I would have killed them if I could.  So, I use the affirmation, "Jesus christ forgives through me."  this has nothing to do with if you are or are not religios.  Are or are not a Christian.  Seriously.  Set all of that aside.  Another day's discussion.  In order to fully heal you must forgive.  In instances it is ok not to forget.  that protects you from future harm.  So if you don't know how to forgive, say, "jesus christ forgives in me."  Forgiveness will occur in your being.  You will no longer have negative emotions related to the perpetrators of you.  And that's a load off my and your backs.  Back to #1.  Shame.  I don't know much about it.  I will learn.  But, set aside your shame if you carry any, you'll have to set it aside in order to esteem yourself, actively love yourself and walk into your dream.  some of my affirmations are.  "I am recovering well."  "I am loved with greatness."  "Mother Mary comforts me, seeking words of wisdom, let it be, let it be."  And surprisingly I have many many spiritual mothers, they just show up and mother me.  better than I ever knew a mother could.  literally.  "I am successful."  "jesus christ forgives through me all those who have done harm to me."  "I am standing on my own two feet well."  Even if you are not doing it, say the affirmations.  then, when those situations are yor life, walk into them.  Accept the gift.  I think it's god giving us another chance at a beautiful life.  "I am counted.  I am counted well."  "I count."  "I am making lots of money."  "I am bucking up."  (I've worked too hard in this life.  But here I am leading an organization.  I am bucking up for me and them.  I work a little  but it's so fun I don't realize I'm working.  Like, I have to travel to lead my organization.  I do not favor traveling.  But I'm bucking up.  It is rewarding.  I have to lead my ladies.  "I am bucking up, for my ladies/organization."  For their children, and the women and children of the world.  Whatever it is that you envision for yourself.  State it in a positive way just like it is happening now.  Then say it over and over with believing that it is the state of reality as we know it right here and now.  Cheers!  Carrie