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Breaking Through

People always seem amazed by the fact that I am happy. I have had people ask me, "With all you have gone through, how can you feel happiness?" The first time someone asked me this I was speechless and the only thing that came to mind was, "I live in the present, not the past. My present is a beautiful place." Then the person responded, "Oh, so you've gotten over the abuse then?" Well - No! I feel we never "get over" the abuse we have lived through in the past, but we make a conscious choice to move forward - to break through the past of the pain into the light of today. We don't "get over" abuse. It isn't a fence we can climb and drop onto the other side; its like a brick wall and we can either beat our heads against it or slowly chisel away it. We can break through the wall. Let me repeat that - we can break through the wall - it just takes time and patience. We will have setbacks, but we can never give up if we want to make it through.

 

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Last spring, I asked one of my professors for words of encouragement for my workbook. She wrote a note about my resilience.

You're amazingly resilient, Stacey. We don't get over abuse, that's for sure, but we learn to overcome it. We learn to cope with the pain and anxiety with which we deal. We find the things that comfort us. In finding our own individual ways to move forward, we become happy. There's still beauty in life and our best days have yet to happen.

I wish I had found this site sooner than 2012, but you've grown enormously these past five years from what I've read on your blogs. Congratulations, Stacey.

haven't seen you here in a while, dear friend - hope everything's going great for you :)

how's school coming along ?

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About Stacey Lannert

Stacey is free. In January 2009, Missouri Governor Matt Blunt commuted her sentence of life without parole. She is currently speaking out about sexual abuse and sharing her message of love, healing and forgiveness.